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Second Five Principles of the 69 Steps Principles 6 through 10 make up the second set of principles. These principles
help support the Golden Rules and supply suggested guidelines for travelling through the 69 steps. Many of these principles
are very broad. They could easily be the focus of an entire book. Here, I will only attempt to introduce the topics to you.
If you find an area that you feel weak, please follow up with additional study.
Now on to Principles 6-10.
Principle Number 6.
Your Partner is always a GREAT Lover This principle helps you stay loyal to the Golden Rule that says
"Make her the most special person in the world". It is a good rule of life, but has a special meaning within the 69 steps.
A majority of the other sexual approaches allows the lady to reciprocate
during love making. Usually there is a place for the woman to use her skills to make her lover feel good. However, at the
same time that the woman makes her lover feel good, she is also building her self image and esteem as a woman.
The 69 steps does not allow this response. In fact, it is the exact opposite. The lady is expected
to totally relax and concentrate only on her own pleasure. Any attempt that she makes to stimulate her male partner is seen
as disruptive to the steps. Therefore, when a man takes a woman through the steps, a woman will automatically feel a certain
level of insecurity. There may even be some guilt that she is not doing her share.
These thoughts and worries are counter productive. When you are taking her through the steps, you don't want her to
be thinking about whether she is good enough or not. She shouldn't be thinking about whether she is enough of a woman for
you. Even more concerning is that for her to worry about whether she is a good enough lover or not.
It is critical that you stop these feelings. You need to place her mind an ease and explain it all in very
clear terms. This is not the time to be subtle or hints. You need to clearly and firmly but politely explain it to her. Be
sure to explain that this is her night. Explain that you only want to make sure that she has fun.
Now here is where this principle is applied. Even with your explanation, she will need your reassurance
that she is okay. If she has never been through the steps, then you will usually notice a tension. Her muscles will be tight.
As she feels more excited, you will see her start to relax. She will start to drift into a foggy state, a world of pleasure.
Then, it will be as if she catches herself and forces herself back into control. It is generally very obvious. She may shake
her head to clear the cobwebs. Generally she will attempt to take a more active role in the kissing or touching. Here is where
she will need you to reaffirm her.
Tell her how beautiful she is. Vocalize
the things you find wonderful about her. Caress her and let her know that the only thing that you need from her is for her
to relax and have a good time. Tell her how good she makes you feel just to be there with her.
Remember, at least in the early stages, you are taking away every tool she has of being a great lover. She
is being asked to surrender everything. Make it a good thing.
Now some
warnings. There should be no need to write this. However, I suspect that there is. Don't, no matter what the case, cut down
her body or ability to make love. Don't even make a joke about any part of her body. Sometimes women that feel insecure about
a part of their body (either their tits are too little or butt is too big) will attempt to cut themselves down. Sometimes
it will be in a joke. Don't play the game. Jokes are often disgusted cutdowns or insults. Every word that you say; every action
that you take should reinforce how wonderful that she is.
If you build up your lover and create confidence, you will be surprised at the results. She will grow and
blossom into a lady that you could have never dreamed of. You will go far further with positive reinforcement than with any
type of negative or punishment approach. As with all negative discussions, if there is something that must be handled, then
handle it well away from the loving making (in both time and location).
Remember
your partner is always a GREAT lover.
Principle 7.
Learn the art of kissing The art of kissing is another one of those things that you are suppose
to just know. It is something that is suppose to be natural to you on that first date. Unfortunately, there is no kissing
gene in the human DNA structure. Kissing is an art like painting or writing. It must be studied and perfected, but come off
as spontaneous and natural.
The main point of this principle is to understand that there is an art to kissing and that it plays a critical
part in the early steps. It is difficult to explain in black and white. Further, there is no way that I can give the full
details here. However, I will attempt to give the highlights.
1) Women
tend to enjoy kissing a lot more than men. The vast majority of ladies that I have meet have always enjoy the kissing. Most
feel that the man quits too soon. I challenge my male students to a test.
During
the early steps, do not push past the kissing. Control yourself and act like that kissing is something that you could do all
day. While you are doing this, how long does it take the lady to get bored? I have found that the answer is that most ladies
do not get bored with it. They can go on and on and on.
Granted there are
the exception. If you see a lady getting bored, move on. Don't frustrate her. However, on the other hand, give it a try. You
may be the first guy in her life that is willing to take the time to kiss her until she is satisfied. And, if you are not
in such a hurry to get past the kissing, you might find that you like it too. In fact, if you don't like, I would challenge
you to learn to like it. This one principle can make you very popular.
2) Kissing is one of the most overlooked ways of getting a woman hot. This is especially true
with French kisses. I have found over the year that there is a direct link between a deep french kiss and sexual arousal.
I have heard it described as your kisses make me tingle all over. A broader description has been, "you make me feel so good
when you kiss me like that".
These kisses are a hidden asset for you. Since
they are considered "first base", they are generally easier to access early. Since they can have a direct effect on the pelvis
sensory nerves, you can stimulate a woman in a much more sexual way through a "non-sexual" action.
3) Know your kisses. There are a lot more than one type of kiss in the world. Different kisses are good
for different time. You can go anywhere from the chicken peck (which is virtually useless) to the deep throat french kiss.
There are different variations through out. Learn them and experiment with them.
4) Kisses are associated with love. When you look at honeymooning couples, you will notice a lot of kissing. As the
couple gets use to each other, it tends to drift away. There are a lot of wives out there that would like to go back when
they were kissed and adored. They felt important and loved. If a man spends enough time kissing, it can affect a lot of other
emotions.
5) A kiss is more than two lips touching. It is hard sometimes
to remember to do two or three things at once. However, you will be surprise at the effectiveness of making the kiss more.
For example, while you kiss her, make sure that nothing but your lips touch.
Was it a good kiss?
No, I did not think so. So there is more than two lips
touching. Now kiss her and stroke her hair. Kiss her and hold her so that her body is melting with yours. Kiss her and rub
her back ever so softly. Was it any better?
Let her enjoy the kiss. You
will have to concentrate on what you are doing. Are you rubbing the small of her back? Is her head tilted at the right angle
to make her comfortable? Are you holding her close so that your bodies are together? What are your hands doing (or they productive)?
What are your lips doing? What is your tongue doing? Where are your arms and legs relative to her? Use everything that you
have.
From her point of view, she should feel like she can let go and not
think about anything. She doesn't have to worry about any of the movement. She should be able to soak up the caresses and
touches. She should be able to feel loved and cared about. For her, it was magic. It just happened.
It does takes time to learn to keep several things going at once. It also moves you out of the mood. However,
this is her night anyway right? Focus and make sure that all the pieces are there.
5) Be flexible. There are some women that want nothing more than to be held tight and told that everything will be
okay. They will enjoy the full body hugs and the feel of arms around them in such a way that they feel safe. There are other
women that feel trapped and will feel suffocated. (a sign of a different issue). If you start with one approach and you see
a roadblock or it is not working, you need to be flexible to switch tactics.
The
bottom line for this principle is that kissing is not automatic. You have decide which type of kiss to use at the right time.
You have to decide what other physical contact to make at the time of the kiss to make it great. Your objective is to read
all the signs and give her a kiss that will knock her socks off. The vast majority of these kisses are not from love at first
sight. The majority of these kisses are from men that read the signs and do the right things at the right time.
Don't underestimate the power of kiss. Learn the art of kissing. Understand how it all works
together.
Principle Number 8.
Enjoy the foreplay This is a simple principle that is very straight forward. It can be restated as foreplay is
something to be enjoyed and not rushed through. Granted, it is a required step. However, it is full of pleasures and excitement.
Foreplay is a time when you can savor the moment. You can enjoy the small things.
Part of the training for a student of the 69 steps is to avoid sexual intercourse for six months. During this time,
the student can do anything he wants to seek and give pleasure but intercourse. I am not going to lie to you. If it not easy
to refuse intercourse when the sexual feelings are high, and lady is ready. However, a student must have high levels of self
control and discipline. (To be discussed later)
The bottom line of this
principle is the lady will know when you attempt to rush through foreplay. They will know it if you are not having fun. They
will react to it by trying to rush themselves, feel bad about themselves, or show you what you want to see (fake it).
If you follow this principle, you will gain in at least two areas. You will learn more about
the woman's body because you will take the time to know it. Where is she ticklish? Does she have any birthmarks? Does she
have any moles? You should know her body inside and out. The second area is that you and the lady will have more fun if you
don't rush through this stage.
Relax and enjoy the foreplay.
Principle Number 9.
Remember the scent To be continued
Principle Number 10.
Listen to her fantasies and desires. To be continued.
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